Marriage is a full package and depending on your spouse, you might get more than you wanted or nothing close to what you really wanted. Abigail was married to probably one of the richest men in her community. Nabal had property at Carmel, and was very wealthy. He had a thousand goats and three thousand sheep (1 Samuel 25:2). I am sure Abigail did not need to worry about food and other things needed for daily living. In fact, she was able to organize a party for an army of over 600 people in just a short time without asking for help from her husband: “She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys” (1 Samuel 25:18). Even in the 21st century, it would cost a fortune to prepare this meal fit for a king. In other words, money and food wouldn’t have been a worry for Abigail. Her worry was the fact that she was a beautiful and intelligent woman who was married to a foolish and brutish man. Such an irony! When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing at all until daybreak. About ten days later, the Lord struck Nabal and he died. (1 Samuel 25:36, 38) Abigail acted wisely to save herself, Nabal and the whole family from David’s attack. David confirmed that if Abigail had not intervened, not one male belonging to Nabal would have been left alive by daybreak (1 Samuel 25:34. Meanwhile, the chief culprit, Nabal, was partying. He had no clue what he had caused and how his wickedness had almost escalated to a potential death threat. The matter was settled and David and his men returned to their hideout. Abigail might have shared a sigh of relief. “When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing at all until daybreak” (1 Samuel 25:36). Nabal’s folly had put his entire household in trouble, meanwhile he was oblivious of the impending doom and was just drinking his life away. Imagine the state David and his men would have met Nabal. He would have been so drunk without any control to mitigate the impact of his actions. Thankfully Abigail was up for the task. Throughout the story of Abigail, she demonstrated patience towards Nabal. First, she didn’t start by nagging and accusing Nabal for refusing to assist David and his men. Abigail was patient enough to take care of the situation. When she returned to meet her very drunk husband, she was patient enough to let matters lie until he became sober. What an attitude! Most women in the position of Abigail would have started the drama right after the servants mentioned the incident. Others would have caused a scene at the sheep shearing knowing that Nabal was partying while his attitudes had almost caused an extermination. Abigail knew the nature of her husband, she patiently waited until daybreak. “Then in the morning, when Nabal was sober, his wife told him all these things, and his heart failed him and he became like a stone” (1 Samuel 25:37). In his sober state, Nabal was convicted of his action. He knew that if Abigail had not intervened, he would have been a dead man. The message Bible renders 1 Samuel 25:37-38 this way: “But in the morning, after Nabal had sobered up, she told him the whole story. Right then and there he had a heart attack and fell into a coma. About ten days later God finished him off and he died” (1 Samuel 25:36-38 MSG). When Nabal understood the full weight of his actions, his heart and body failed him. He might have been a real fool to have missed the bigger picture of his actions. Nabal’s folly led him to an early grave leaving behind a beautiful and intelligent widow. Abigail’s marriage with Nabal ended on a very sad note. Her own husband orchestrated his own downfall. What would become of Abigail? What if her husband had made many other enemies beside David? Abigail might have had to develop enough patience to live with Nabal. Her marriage was desirable when it came to money and provision but in attitude, Abigail had to accommodate the messes of Nabal. Indeed, love is patient and kind. Patience is a virtue. If we lose patience, we ultimately lose ourselves and the battle of controlling our anger. If we don’t learn to be patient, we would ultimately become a patient to our impatience and anger. Anger lies in the bosom of fools (Ecclesiastes 7:9). The remedy for Nabal’s trouble was Abigail’s patience.
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